A Few Thoughts on My Bloody Valentine

My first though obviously is, could there be a crappier remake? But for those of you wanting more, here are some of my additional thoughts on MBV, accompanied by stills and funny captions.
 Did anyone else notice the striking similarity between the killer and Dr. Satan’s monster from House of 1000 Corpses?

You would have to be dumb, deaf and blind not to figure out that Tom was the killer about halfway through with all that mirroring movement with the killer and him being gone when the murders occur. Who do they think we are, Lois Lane?

The movie jumps forward ten years to pick up with the main characters after the massacre, but no one has aged a day? That’s Hollywood for you.
In an excellent excuse for full frontal female nudity, an irate woman goes after a trucker in the parking lot after he videotapes them having sex. Favorite line—Trucker: “Put some clothes on before some kid sees you.”

Axel is a slut and Sarah is an idiot for taking him back.

Hearts make the best candy.
You really show a girl you love her by killing everyone around her.

And finally, I’m so glad I did not have to sit through this torture in 3D...

Luke, I am your father.

This is the worst Valentine’s Day ever!

 Don’t run! I just want to know what aisle the pickles are on.

I just got these highlights. Bummer.

I really have to work on my back-spatter technique.

Comments

  1. the jaded viewerFebruary 28, 2010 at 9:38 PM

    I like the gratuitous 3D stomach effect...i mean they were trying so hard for some 3d cool moments...most of them were awful

    ReplyDelete
  2. DrunkethWizerdMarch 1, 2010 at 4:02 PM

    I've seen quite a few 3D features in the last two years in the Cinema and this movie was the most badass out of all of them. The other shit couldn't even compare to the 3D effects these guys pulled off.

    ReplyDelete

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