Please Don't Touch Me!


A strange plague has overtaken the college campus where I live and work. The half groans, stifled coughs and bleary eyes of thousands of sick college students have crescendoed into something akin to zombie hysteria! Almost everyone I know has succumbed to flu-like symptoms and I am tempted to teach class in a hazmat suit.

I'm actually washing my hands on a regular basis and not indulging in the five second rule (yes, I have eaten food off the floor before--but it was a triple-decker fudge brownie!).

So wash your hands, cover your cough and for goodness sakes, please don't touch me!
(for anyone who got that last reference to famous horror musical, kudos to you).

Comments

  1. AnonymousSeptember 24, 2009 at 12:07 PM

    Seriously, its crazy. I heard there are 3 strains of the flu running around and doctors are bracing for the worst flu season ever. On top of that, this is the first year on record that consistent flu cases where reported throughout the summer when normally strains die out due to the heat. Evolving pathogens? Zoinks!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Monster ScholarSeptember 24, 2009 at 6:07 PM

    I just found out a guy in the office across from mine came down with swine flu. I can only assume the government came and took him away since he has not attended class or taught his assigned classes.

    ReplyDelete
  3. ScottSeptember 24, 2009 at 7:26 PM

    Jeanette,

    There's a lot of flu here in Texas, isn't there? A friend of mine has it right now.

    Stay healthy!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mykal BantaSeptember 26, 2009 at 8:53 PM

    Jeanette: I work at a library in Florida. A good percentage of my staff has been out sick lately. It seems to start with a rampaging head-ache and goes into dreadful "flu-like symptoms."

    Today, a sickie tried to come to work. When he blundered his sputtering and dripping way into my office, I actually got up from my desk, took a step back, and held my hand out in the classic "stop right there" gesture. I ordered him from the building before he could put his backpack away.

    A few of the staff watched him make his way across the parking lot to his car, stumbling in the hot sunshine, and then they all thanked me for my swift and decisive action.

    I am sure he will return as the walking dead and kill us all. If you hear of the staff of a library in South Florida being mysteriously wiped out by "what must have been a pack of wild dogs," please tell the world the truth. -- Mykal

    ReplyDelete

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