More Disturbing Twilight Products

You've seen the t-shirts, the Edward Cullen shower curtain, the Twilight panties with Edward’s face in the crotch and have at least heard about the sparkly pink “Vamp” sex toy. Still, it seems there is no end in sight to the madness of Twilight merchandising, as evidenced these ever more disturbing Twilight products.

Smell like Bella and Edward with this new line of body sprays and soaps. Ever wonder what a sparkly vampire smells like? According to this product he’s an “intoxicating” mix of “honey, lilac and sun”
Creep out your bedroom in with this shrine to Twilight. Only 14.99.
Edward may have told Bella to look after his heart, but who’s going to look after your money? With this Twilight checkbook cover you’ll be able to dish out money for even more Twilight merchandise in style.
This technically isn’t a product but it still rates high on the creep scale. Feast your eyes on this felt replica of Bella’s womb with Edward’s bloodthirsty offspring Renesmee inside. That’s right; someone took the time to make a felt replica of BELLA SWAN’S WOMB. This has to be a sign of the apocalypse.
Twilight moms should be thrilled at this “Team Jacob” pattern that allows them to cross stitch Jacob’s abs on everything from pillows to throw rugs.
Two out of three vampires agree this Twilight mosaic table is a great conversation piece.
Ever wondered what vampires TASTE like? Wonder no more. Go out and get yourself of can of “Salt and Vampire” Pringles. Pringles replaced Vinegar with Vampire for 20% less sodium.
Become Bella in this dazzling rendition of her birthday dress. Available at Hot Topic.
Fantasize about marrying one of the undead when you slip Bella’s very own wedding ring on your finger. A token of Edward’s undying love for Bella, it also means you’ll be giving birth to a bloodthirsty demon growing in your uterus. Wedded bliss can be yours in exchange for this cheap trinket.
Thirteen year old Twihards everywhere can now show off their barely there bosoms with his bra bearing the Cullen Crest. Instead of wearing your heart on your sleeve, wear this imaginary crest on your cleavage to show your support for the Twilight franchise.
Whip up some dessert for your undead sweetheart with the Unofficial Twilight Cookbook. Make everything from Love at First Bite to Bella's Lasagna and Harry's Famous Fish Fry.

Further Reading:
30 Most Disturbing Twilight Products

Comments

  1. This is a little too odd for me.. I like twlight but not that much

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  2. Make it stop! That womb replica is especially disturbing.

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  3. Omg...haha I can't stop laughing about the womb and the cross stitch pattern...and the pringles?!!

    It really is the end of the world!

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  4. The furry womb is hilarious! Why is it black inside, shouldn't it sparkle? Is there a recipe for boudin noir (blood sausage) in the cook book? Bwahahaha!

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  5. All scary moments, no doubt ... but if you ever want to be really terrified, check out Showgirls! ;)

    ReplyDelete

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