Taylor claims that New Moon “is a lot more complicated than Twilight was,” but from where I’m sitting it looks like the same old emo rag we’ve been bombarded with in the first film. Bella spirals into a depression after Edward leaves her in order to keep her safe (as if that makes any sense). Jacob steps in as the friend who comforts Bella in all his shirtless and tanned glory.
On that note, Jacob’s hair is having some serious continuity issues in this trailer with shots of him in long locks intermixed with his shorter do. Jacob also doesn’t miss an opportunity to go shirtless, as he offers Bella his clothing when she’s injured and does some impressive Cirque du Soleil acrobatics to catapult himself into Bella’s window.
I am also amazed at Bella’s continuing state of helplessness. She always needs someone else to save her from supernatural beasties and even the power of inertia as she falls off a dirt bike. I would just once like to see her pick herself up a la Anita Blake and gut herself a vampire for looking at her the wrong way.
To tell the truth, the only thing this trailer has me looking forward to (because it sure as heck ain't the CGI werewolves) is Dakota Fanning as Jane, because I have a thing for kid vampires. Dakota has proven her acting mettle by cornering the market on child actors for the past decade and I’m interested to see what she’ll do with this character.
To close I’d like to say some things about Jacob’s final words in the trailer. “Don’t make me upset”? What is he the Incredible Hulk? Is he going to explode into wolf bits if he does get his din din? Or maybe his caramel macchiato didn’t have enough cinnamon sprinkles. GIVE.ME.A.BREAK.